Is It Anxiety… Or A Message From Your Soul?
You feel stuck.
You feel like you’re squirming your way through the neck of a bottle with no momentum or clarity to get yourself out. You’re tired of doing what you (or others) think you should do. You want to start living from your own wisdom and calling.
You’re tired of feeling conflicted or anxious inside and you’re ready for change, but you don’t know where to start.
You want to listen to your heart and intuition and you’re seeking ways to do so.
Inner conflict and anxiety are actually a “wake up call” from your soul saying “it’s time to live life differently. It’s time to live from your wisdom and truth, and live in THIS moment instead of worrying about the future.”
I get it. I’ve been there. I found a way forward and I’m dedicated to helping you find yours.
I fell to the pink rug in my living room, hyperventilating, crying uncontrollably, feeling like I was going crazy. What was wrong with me? Why couldn’t I hold myself together?
“I’m strong, capable, a mountain guide – indestructible (so I thought) – how could this be happening to ME?” I thought.
I hadn’t told anyone about the anxiety I’d been having up to this point. Not my family, my closest friends, and definitely not my boyfriend at the time. They thought everything was totally fine (and I had never let anyone see me cry).
In fact, people thought we were the “perfect couple,” and often asked when we were getting married.
What they didn’t know is that the anxiety had gotten so bad (a stabbing pain in my chest), that I had lost the will to live. I thought, “What’s the point in being this miserable?” I laid on the couch crying on many days, lacking motivation, hearing this little voice in the far reaches of my head whispering, “He’s not right for you.”
I ignored it, the anxiety increased. I tried anxiety meds and anti-depressants that only made me feel worse.
I tried cleaning the house believing that would ease the anxiety. I’d run harder, go faster, stay busier, but none of that helped.
When I was lying on that pink rug, a voice inside said, “You’ve GOT to get help.”
I had never asked for help before. I thought going to counseling meant there was something “wrong” with me.
But I couldn’t continue living like this. Something shifted in that moment.
I couldn’t keep proving myself, being strong all the time, keeping people at a distance from my heart to stay safe, and running from anxiety.
I realized I was being torn apart by the war inside between my intuition and the “shoulds.” My perfectionist tendencies were exhausting. I was done with trying “to do it all,” have the perfect relationship and pretending to look happy doing it.
I was trying to be someone I believed others would like, instead of the real me.
So I peeled myself up off the floor, started going to counseling (found out it was a panic attack on the pink rug), ended the relationship (all the anxiety went away within 3 days of this), and began an 8 year journey of spiritual and intuitive exploration with a silent 10 day meditation retreat (never having meditated before).
Now I help you to do the same
My passion, my calling, is for you to be totally you.
Through private coaching, in-depth retreats, and online group coaching programs, I help you tap into your intuition and clarify your desires and vision, I guide you to take active steps toward making your desires a reality.
I’ve been a Transformational Coach and Spiritual Teacher for over 5 years, helping hundreds of clients and students find more peace and joy in their lives through private coaching, speaking engagements, dharma talks, and retreats.
I guide and support you to produce extraordinary results in your life by:
- Creating deeper and more meaningful relationships and friendships
- Making quiet time for yourself a priority
- Cultivating the courage to speak your truth and live authentically
- Taming your inner critic to build compassion and acceptance for yourself when it’s most needed
- Beginning to uncover clues and creative ideas about your calling or a creative outlet you didn’t know existed
I do this work because I believe if one of us is not free, none of us are free. I know what it feels to shackle my soul in fear and feel powerless to move forward, like it was yesterday. My heart longs to help you be free from suffering, free from the constructs of fear, and free from the cage that keeps your heart closed and your true self from coming to light.
The world needs you. YOU need you.
Let me help you come home to yourself.
After 10 Days of Silence I Discovered…
The most extraordinary peace I had ever known up to that point. It was the hardest 10 days of my life, but gave me the most important insight of my life – that I didn’t have to keep living my life as I had been.
Meditation and this new “path of awakening” called to me, but I was easily distracted by shiny objects like new romances, sexy type work like ski instructing and mountaineering guiding, and the ease of NOT meditating.
However, the calling came back in strength, especially after being diagnosed with a 2 year virus in my head. My body was the teacher, and it was telling me to come home (to my True Self).
I went on a pilgrimage to the home of the Dalai Lama in India where I stood on the sideline of the single lane road leading to his home at the end of the village. He went by, his eyes gazed upon mine and I broke into tears (crying in public for the first time).
I’d never felt that kind of love and compassion from another human being. It was a total acceptance.
I learned later it’s the look and feel of oneness. He sees every being as a manifestation of Love.
It strikes the heart like nothing else can. He showed me what’s possible.
I finally landed in a 2-year spiritual program Buddhist and Nondual traditions with Matthew Flickstein, a former Buddhist monk. When I met him at a retreat, I was at a loss in my life (once again). I was searching for something, but I had no direction.
When he talked about the program, I knew that was it. Starting from the first month, my outlook on life changed even more deeply. He taught me about gratitude, forgiveness, and generosity. He showed me the freedom possible when I looked at my own aging body and the death that’s inevitable of this body.
For the first time, I wasn’t the center of my universe any more, but felt connected to everyone and everything around me. It was true liberation!
The second year, we had 3 week long retreats with Matthew, and on the third retreat, my business, my calling came through me, like a Divine download. I don’t know how else to describe it. I took notes and offered my first workshop on authentic living 3 weeks later.
I continue to practice and study with Matthew, author of several books, including Journey to the Center and writer/producer of the powerful documentary With One Voice.
When I’m not coaching, teaching, or speaking, you’ll find me outside running, hiking, riding my bike, paddle boarding, wildlife watching, tango dancing, meditating, doing yoga or relaxing by a river, lake, or ocean with a dear friend watching the clouds go by.
Little-known facts about my adventurous past that you may find intriguing:
- I climbed the world’s most beautiful mountain, Alpamayo, in Peru.
- I spent 3 months hitchhiking around New Zealand with my skis.
- I’ve spent more days of my life sleeping in a tent than I have in a bed.
- I lived with a family in Guatemala to learn Spanish (un poquito!)
- I love learning about other cultures and being outside of my comfort zone.
- I grew up in a suburb of Southern California (go figure!)
Download 3 Simple Steps to a Heart-Centered Meditation Practice here.
If freedom is calling you now, and you’d like to have your own “retreat” experience without even having to leave your house… I condensed the last 15 years of study into a downloadable ebook you can get instant access to and begin your journey right now from anxiety into deep dialogue with the love of your own soul.
Because THAT is what everyone is truly looking for.
And that’s what will bring you back HOME.
You can download that right here.
So Much Love,
P.S. More recently, I’ve healed myself of chronic pain and technology sensitivity, which has given me a whole new perspective and skill set on working with the power of the mind. You can read more about that healing story here.