In 2008, after spending a year training to try out for the most prestigious ski instructor team in the country, I walked away in tears, shaken after 5 days of evaluation and putting my all into it.

My thoughts were, “Why did I bother? What was the point? What am I going to do now? I don’t know what to do with my life. God doesn’t want me to succeed.”

That last one – that was a doozy. Can you hear the blaming, complaining, and victimization all in that one statement?

I went into 6 months of depression, believing that statement. The self pity bus was driving out of control, and my hands were clearly not on the steering wheel.

I’ve played the victim a lot in my life. I know it well.

I flopped back and forth between blaming others or myself.

The reality was, I was creating exactly what I was thinking. The victim. It didn’t change anything in my life. It kept me stuck in a loop of self pity, blaming, and negativity.

I needed to get out.

I read this quote recently that sums it all up: “You become the hero of your own journey when you get tired of being the victim of your journey.”

Well said. I was tired of it. I just didn’t know how to change it.

It wasn’t until I met my teacher Matthew Flickstein, that I began to see life in a new way. He taught me about generosity, gratitude, compassion, forgiveness, joy, and so much more.

My thoughts began to change – who knew you could change your thoughts?

Fast forward to now, and I’ve learned there’s actually science behind it. When you change your thoughts, you change your reality.

We’re only .00001% matter (physical form), and 99.99999% energy. Isn’t that amazing? So what that means is that every thought you have is a form of energy – it’s creating your reality moment to moment.

Negative thoughts create a negative reality, positive thoughts create a positive reality. It’s not airy fairy – it’s quantum physics. Watch the movie What the Bleep Do We Know, or read Bruce Lipton’s book The Biology of Belief for more on this.

The great news – because our brains are changeable (neuroplasticity), we can create the thoughts want, thus creating our own reality.

Here’s some examples of what I mean:
Victim thought: “This always happens to me.”
Hero thought: “I’m patient and take a deep breath everyday.”

Victim thought: “My daughter is a handful and difficult.”
Hero thought: “My daughter has a bold personality and I accept and love her as she is.”

Victim thought: “I’ll never find the career that gives me purpose.”
Hero thought: “There’s the perfect career out there for me that is my souls calling.”

Victim thought: “The holidays are so hard. My family is impossible.”
Hero thought: “I am open and loving with my family.”

Victim thought: “My spouse is impossible. They don’t listen to what I want.”
Hero thought: “I am clear with what I need, and listen to and respect my spouses needs.”

Victim thought: “There’s never enough money. I’m surviving from one paycheck to the next.”
Hero thought: “I am abundant and thriving. There’s enough money and there’s enough time.”

It takes focus and practice to change your thoughts, along with a clear determination.

Notice what your predominant thought pattern is in relation to relationships, health, money, career, family, sex, or other parts of your life.

I can almost guarantee there’s a pattern or a loop that your mind is caught in – and it can be changed!

Here’s what you do:
1. Notice the looping victim thought pattern
2. Be clear that you want to let go of it to become the hero of your journey
3. Every time the victim thought pattern arises in your mind and you notice, say the opposing Hero thought pattern at least 20 times.

Doing this will actually cause a new neural pathway to form over time, and in turn dissolve the old victim looping neural pathway.

Isn’t that remarkable?

Okay – get to work being the hero of you journey my dear friend.
I believe in you – you can do this!
Happy Solstice!

Categories: Feminine Power, Health & Happiness, Money Conciousness, Relationships