“What you focus on grows, what you think about expands and what you dwell on determines your destiny.” That would mean that we are 100% responsible for our thinking. Darn it! It was so much easier when I could blame my dad for all my problems. Or blame my boyfriend, or even blame my house!
Do you find yourself noticing more often what you don’t want in your life or in yourself than what you do? If so, I understand, I did it too. And it didn’t get me anywhere. I kept repeating the pattern over, and over, and over again of what I didn’t want. Because I had no road map for where I was going.
Now I live my life by walking an active road map. I choose (and that’s the beauty here, you have a choice!) to walk your life with an active road map for what you do want.
Here’s what I suggest.
Sit down for five minutes and do this exercise:
- Think about people in your life that you admire. Notice what it is you really like or admire about them. (friends, family, authors, actors, singers, religious figures)
- Write these down in one word qualities
- Pick the top two or three that are themes between people
- Choose the one of these that most resonates for you
- This is the quality for you that is most important right now to cultivate in your life
This quality is your road map. Now take this quality and put it into an affirmation:
“I am bold in my actions and business”
“I have an open heart toward myself and others”
Say it to yourself everyday. Even write it down and post it somewhere that you can see it everyday. We need reminders in changing our thought patterns!
Now you are focusing on a way of being that you want to cultivate instead of what you want to leave behind. Way more effective.
Another way you can change your way of thinking, is notice what it is that you don’t want to be or have less of in your life, and think about what the opposite of that is, and put your attention there.
“I want to feel less guilty”
“I am compassionate towards myself in my actions and words”
Again, way more powerful, and a lot more effective to creating a life that you love.
Be well, be happy, and focus on what it is you want to grow!